Change


Charlie and Ruth liked to get to the diner early on Sunday, the old Buick angled in to a parking spot right in front of the diner's windows so that Charlie could ensure nobody was stealing his old Buick, not that anyone would want to steal that old boat of a car, Ruth always thought.

"Three eggs over easy," Charlie told the waitress when she tried to hand him a menu. "Sausage. Toast, no butter. You new here?"

The waitress blushed, fingered the lace at her collar. "Can you tell?"

"You're doing fine, sweetie." Ruth hated the way her husband was so darn bossy all the time, acting as if the entire world ought to know what exactly what Charlie Browning wanted. She opened her menu and pretended to study it, even though she, like Charlie, always ordered the same thing every day. "Half a grapefruit, please." She smiled at the waitress, noticed her name tag read Carolyne. She liked that spelling, liked the way it was just a bit different. "With a maraschino cherry, please." She regretted the second please. Charlie would tell her she was groveling later, in the car while they were driving home. "And two Belgian waffles, no whipped cream." She folded the menu and gave it to Carolyne.


They waited in silence, watching the holy-rollers, as Charlie called them, stream into the diner, talking loudly and animatedly, all smiles and perfume.

"This here's our place," Charlie said, when Carolyne set his plate before him, after one of the church-goers had received their breakfasts. "We come here religiously." He picked up his fork and stabbed at his eggs as if they were somehow to blame. He plucked the maraschino from Ruth's grapefruit and put it in his mouth.

"I really wanted that."

"Whatever." Charlie cut his sausage in half with the side of his fork.

Ruth decided then and there to order what she wanted tomorrow: Grits. With a side of sausage gravy. She smiled. Charlie would be angry.

This was written for this week's Trifecta Writing Challenge. The word was whatever.



Labels: , ,

Writing in the Margins, Bursting at the Seams: Change

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Change


Charlie and Ruth liked to get to the diner early on Sunday, the old Buick angled in to a parking spot right in front of the diner's windows so that Charlie could ensure nobody was stealing his old Buick, not that anyone would want to steal that old boat of a car, Ruth always thought.

"Three eggs over easy," Charlie told the waitress when she tried to hand him a menu. "Sausage. Toast, no butter. You new here?"

The waitress blushed, fingered the lace at her collar. "Can you tell?"

"You're doing fine, sweetie." Ruth hated the way her husband was so darn bossy all the time, acting as if the entire world ought to know what exactly what Charlie Browning wanted. She opened her menu and pretended to study it, even though she, like Charlie, always ordered the same thing every day. "Half a grapefruit, please." She smiled at the waitress, noticed her name tag read Carolyne. She liked that spelling, liked the way it was just a bit different. "With a maraschino cherry, please." She regretted the second please. Charlie would tell her she was groveling later, in the car while they were driving home. "And two Belgian waffles, no whipped cream." She folded the menu and gave it to Carolyne.


They waited in silence, watching the holy-rollers, as Charlie called them, stream into the diner, talking loudly and animatedly, all smiles and perfume.

"This here's our place," Charlie said, when Carolyne set his plate before him, after one of the church-goers had received their breakfasts. "We come here religiously." He picked up his fork and stabbed at his eggs as if they were somehow to blame. He plucked the maraschino from Ruth's grapefruit and put it in his mouth.

"I really wanted that."

"Whatever." Charlie cut his sausage in half with the side of his fork.

Ruth decided then and there to order what she wanted tomorrow: Grits. With a side of sausage gravy. She smiled. Charlie would be angry.

This was written for this week's Trifecta Writing Challenge. The word was whatever.



Labels: , ,

25 Comments:

At January 7, 2014 at 6:26 PM , Blogger Tom MacInnes said...

As always, Kelly, you paint such a detailed portrait of your character's everyday lives so that the smallest gestures and comments lead to such depth of insight for the reader. What a talented writer you are, my dear. :)

 
At January 7, 2014 at 6:34 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks so much, Tom! Looking forward to reading everyone's submissions tomorrow.

 
At January 8, 2014 at 4:47 AM , Blogger LaTonya Baldwin said...

Like Tom, I appreciate the details. I also like the pacing and the exchange.

 
At January 8, 2014 at 6:37 AM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks so much for reading!

 
At January 8, 2014 at 9:26 AM , Blogger Gina said...

She should order what she wants! I, too, enjoyed the everyday-ness of the detail and characters. Very engaging story!

 
At January 8, 2014 at 9:56 AM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks so much, Gina! Looking forward to reading your piece this week!

 
At January 8, 2014 at 3:27 PM , Anonymous JannaTWrites said...

Good for her! Charlie has no regard for her wants so she should take care of herself.

 
At January 9, 2014 at 4:33 PM , Blogger Tara R. said...

I thoroughly enjoy your characters. It's like seeing old friends again.

 
At January 9, 2014 at 10:17 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks, Janna!

 
At January 9, 2014 at 10:17 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks so much, Tara - Appreciate your comments.

 
At January 10, 2014 at 8:01 AM , Blogger kymm said...

I love the opposition of Charlie clinging to routine and Ruth embracing small changes. Beautifully subtle.
And those damned holy rollers - lol.

 
At January 10, 2014 at 8:24 AM , Blogger Jo-Anne Teal said...

I agree with Tom's insightful (as always) comments. The small details you expertly include always tell the reader so much of the history and of the characters. Another balanced and beautiful write. I always look forward to seeing your take on the prompts, Kelly. :))

 
At January 10, 2014 at 12:11 PM , Blogger lumdog2012 said...

Like the others who commented on this, I love your attention to detail which brings the reader to the table. I feel like I just watched a movie of this scene. Indeed, you have a real talent!

 
At January 11, 2014 at 5:59 AM , Blogger Lance said...

Love the pace and uber-natural dialogue. I like the play on the word "religiously". It's like we're seeing their "church".

Per usual, amazing writing, ma'am.

 
At January 11, 2014 at 9:29 AM , Blogger Draug said...

Ah but waffles are so much better than grits! haha Great work.

 
At January 11, 2014 at 11:02 AM , OpenID momosapien said...

I really have to agree with Jo-Anne here, if I wrote my own comment it would just echo hers. Excellent story, Kelly.

 
At January 11, 2014 at 11:05 AM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks so much, Kymm -

 
At January 11, 2014 at 11:06 AM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Appreciate your comments, Jo-Anne! This week's prompt was a fun one. (But I miss the Friday prompt!)

 
At January 11, 2014 at 11:06 AM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks Momo - Appreciate your reading!

 
At January 11, 2014 at 11:06 AM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks so much, Lumdog!

 
At January 11, 2014 at 11:07 AM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Ah - Glad you liked that, Lance! Looking forward to Monday's prompt!

 
At January 11, 2014 at 11:08 AM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Grits and sausage gravy - divine. Waffles, not so much for me. Thanks, Draug!

 
At January 12, 2014 at 11:53 AM , Blogger Trifecta said...

This speaks volumes about the ruts and routines people get themselves into. Loved it. Thanks for linking up!

 
At January 12, 2014 at 4:13 PM , Blogger Valerie Boersma said...

Kelly, I love stories where women become stronger and more assertive, and start going after what they want,even if it takes awhile, like it has for our dear Ruth. This was an excellently written piece-and I had to chuckle at Charlie's comment about coming to the diner religiously as he sizes up the holy-rollers. Stroke of genius!

 
At January 12, 2014 at 5:15 PM , Blogger Ann Bennett said...

I believe I have met Charlie several times, different people of course. Grits and sausage gravy is why I avoid breakfast food. I love them and they obviously love me. They stick around. Great characterizations.

 

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