Seems I'm Bursting at the Seams

There’s nothing more shattering to one’s self-esteem than to get a new driver’s license.  You leave the house, hair combed, makeup on, wearing an unstained tee shirt for once in your life.  And then, in the twenty minutes it takes to get to the DMV, you find that your hair has acquired that windblown look despite the fact that you drove with the windows up, quite possibly because you dropped your reading glasses on the sidewalk.  You bend over to retrieve them, hoping all the while that you won’t split your pants open, and you can actually feel your hair shift upon your head: What was off to one side, now hangs straight down.  Those perfect bangs, well, they’re a mess now.

 Your lipstick has disappeared thanks to that apple you ate on the way over.  You suspect you have apple between your teeth.  But no matter.  You never smile at these things anyway. 

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