Hyperbole


She watches the fallout as he chews open-mouthed.

She snaps open the newspaper. He recoils at the gale.

"Feels like we bin married a thousand years."

He pokes at a crumb and nods.

 
This was written for this weekend's Trifecta Writing Challenge in which we were to use hyperbole in thirty-three words.

Labels:

Writing in the Margins, Bursting at the Seams: Hyperbole

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Hyperbole


She watches the fallout as he chews open-mouthed.

She snaps open the newspaper. He recoils at the gale.

"Feels like we bin married a thousand years."

He pokes at a crumb and nods.

 
This was written for this weekend's Trifecta Writing Challenge in which we were to use hyperbole in thirty-three words.

Labels:

20 Comments:

At February 16, 2013 at 6:42 PM , Anonymous Lance said...

and...it's what's not said here that speaks thousands of words.

good work

 
At February 16, 2013 at 11:41 PM , OpenID scriptorwrites said...

This is very good.

 
At February 16, 2013 at 11:43 PM , OpenID scriptorwrites said...

I vote you the winner, if we were voting, that is. Sigh. :( This is really good. You've painted a whole story here in 33 words. Excellent. You should win. :)

 
At February 17, 2013 at 8:00 AM , Blogger ElGuapo said...

I'm curious now as to what brought these two to that point.
Great entry!

 
At February 17, 2013 at 8:11 AM , Blogger kymm said...

Oh, those thousand-year marriages! THE SILENCE IS DEAFENING! [In my hyperbolic way, reiterating Lance's comment] Nice piece, Kelly.

 
At February 17, 2013 at 8:37 AM , Blogger Draug said...

Ah, that silent tension. Definitely feeling the vibes haha :D

 
At February 17, 2013 at 8:45 AM , Blogger Libby said...

This is great...opening the newspaper creates a gale... Nice work :)

 
At February 17, 2013 at 10:15 AM , Blogger Atreyee said...

What a profound piece-love the way it speaks volumes on a lo..ng marriage;-)

 
At February 17, 2013 at 11:48 AM , OpenID whispatory said...

For some reason I pictured them as young, as if their marriage got stale way to quick. But how well you captured that yawning abyss of boredom that can develop!

 
At February 17, 2013 at 12:25 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks, Lance - When is the book release?

 
At February 17, 2013 at 12:25 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks Scriptor! Looking forward to reading your piece.

 
At February 17, 2013 at 12:26 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

I think they're just tired of each other...

 
At February 17, 2013 at 12:26 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks, Kymm.

 
At February 17, 2013 at 12:26 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks, Draug!

 
At February 17, 2013 at 12:26 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

My husband actually does that. Gale force winds when he turns a page in the newspaper.

 
At February 17, 2013 at 12:27 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

Thanks!

 
At February 17, 2013 at 12:27 PM , Blogger Kelly Garriott Waite said...

I'm picturing them older--at least the kids are all out of the house. This was extracted from a longer story I'm working on. Thanks for reading!

 
At February 17, 2013 at 2:09 PM , Blogger lumdog2012 said...

I think I was in a marriage like this. Way too real. Nice job!

 
At February 18, 2013 at 1:36 PM , OpenID joe2poetry said...

"You can't really hate someone after you just met them. To real loathe a person you have to have been married to them for years!" Good piece!

 
At February 20, 2013 at 4:31 PM , Blogger Sandra Tyler said...

your'e so good. I don't think I'd even attempt this challenge...too hard!

 

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home